Working with Ancestors

When we talk about connecting with spirit, it's easy to jump straight into mediumship or psychic tools—but there's a quieter, deeper practice that's often overlooked: ancestral veneration. At its core, ancestral veneration is simply the act of honoring, remembering, and staying connected to the loved ones who came before you.

This doesn't require a special gift or formal ritual, nor does it require you to follow a specific religion or spiritual path. It simply asks that you create space to acknowledge the people whose lives shaped your own.

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What is Ancestor Work?

Ancestral veneration isn't worship—it's remembrance. It's a spiritual practice rooted in respect, gratitude, and relationship. It shows up in cultures across the globe in countless forms, from lighting candles on an altar to saying a loved one's name out loud during a meal.

At its heart, it's about keeping memory alive. It's about creating an energetic line of communication between you and those who walked this earth before you.
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Some people connect through prayer. Others keep photos on a shelf or cook traditional recipes on special occasions. There's no one "right way" to do it—as long as it's meaningful to you.

How to Discover Your Own Traditions

If you're new to this idea, where do I start? What are my ancestral traditions? That's a powerful question—and a personal one.

​Here are a few ways to begin exploring:

• Start with family stories – Ask your relatives what traditions they remember from their parents and grandparents. Even seemingly small details can hold significance.
• Look into your heritage – If you know your cultural or ethnic background, research how those communities honored their dead. This can offer insight into rituals, symbols, or even foods that may feel familiar on a soul level.
• Follow what feels familiar – You might already practice ancestral veneration without realizing it. Lighting a yahrzeit candle, keeping a beloved heirloom, or visiting a grave can all be forms of connection.

What if you don't know your family history?

This practice is still for you.

Whether due to adoption, estrangement, secrecy, or loss of records, not everyone has access to the details of their lineage—and that doesn't exclude you from ancestral connection.

Here's what to keep in mind:

• Honor your chosen family – Whether or not you share blood, the people who raised you, nurtured you or helped you become who you deserve a place in your remembrance.
• Work with collective ancestors – You can venerate ancestors who share your cultural identity, spiritual lineage, or lived experiences (e.g., queer ancestors, survivors, artists, healers).
• Trust your intuition – You may feel a pull toward specific times, places, names, or cultural symbols without knowing why. That resonance is a form of guidance.

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Ancestral veneration isn't limited to names on a family tree—it's about acknowledging the lives that made yours possible, even if the details are unclear.

​Real-Life Inspiration: Día de los Muertos and Coco

One of the most beautiful modern examples of ancestral veneration is Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead), celebrated throughout Mexico. Far from being a somber event, it's a joyful remembrance filled with food, music, flowers, and offerings.

Families build ofrendas (altars) with photos, candles, and favorite items of their deceased loved ones. They believe this is when the veil between worlds is thin—and their ancestors come home to visit.

This tradition was lovingly portrayed in the Disney movie Coco, which introduced many people to the idea that as long as someone is remembered, they are never truly gone. You already have a foundation for understanding ancestral veneration if you've seen it. If you haven't, it's a heartfelt and accessible place to start.

How to Begin Your Own Practice

You don't need to wait for a holiday or know your entire family tree to begin honoring your ancestors.

​Here are a few beginner-friendly ways to start:

• Set up a small altar with photos or keepsakes of loved ones who've passed—or symbols that represent what you'd like to call in.
• Say their names aloud when you think of them, especially on birthdays or anniversaries.
• Cook a traditional or symbolic meal and eat it in their honor.
• Light a candle and speak to them like you would if they sat beside you.
• Write a letter to your ancestors- your energy reaches them even if you don't know their names.

The most important part? Be open. Spirit doesn't always respond how we expect but often responds when we make space.

Why it Matters

​I genuinely believe your connection to your loved ones in spirit is stronger than anything I—or any medium—could deliver. Spirit speaks to you through dreams, signs, music, memories, and synchronicities. The more you create intentional moments of connection, the clearer those messages become.

You don't have to be a medium to talk to your ancestors. You just have to be willing to listen.

Final Thoughts

Ancestral veneration is about relationships, not rituals. It's an ongoing conversation between past and present—a way to honor, remember, and stay connected to the people whose lives made yours possible. Whether you build a full altar or whisper thank you into the air, you continue a sacred lineage of love.

Your ancestors are already with you. All you have to do is reach back.